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« Whoring For Family It | Main | Not The Only Idiot » The Return of Bridezilla
May 16, 2004
The Return of Bridezilla and Groomonster
Bridezilla is 21 years old and horny. That's why she got married today. She did not want to break the vows of her faith by having pre-marital sex so she and The Groomonster fast-tracked the wedding from Hell. The entire family has been in upheaval over this day and it showed on the faces of half the people in the room. To give you just a small example, the wedding programs were just done today. Groomonster's mother had to pick them up from the printer on her way to the church.
We were very specific about what we would be providing and what she needed to provide.
"It is an evening wedding. You cannot feed people appetizers. You need to feed them dinner." "No. I want just light appetizers. That is what I want." "It's your night. So were you thinking along the lines of crudite' and something like chicken sate' and..." "No. I was thinking more along the lines of salmon, maybe some rice, perhaps a steamed vegetable, a couple of salads and I want bread, too." "Um. Ok. So then you want to feed them a dinner." "No. Light appetizers." "But that menu is... never mind." "Well, do I need people to pour punch?" "Yes you do." "Well, do I need people to cut cake?" "Uh, yeah." "Well, can we keep the cost down if I have a group of friends clear plates from the tables?" "Well, can you guarantee that you will have people there to clear the tables? That is a lot to ask of your friends. It would be worth the cost to you to just have us hire our own extra staff." "No, my friends will do it. I promise."
No cake cutters. The mother of the bride had to deal with that. No friends to clear tables. The grandmother of the bride gathered her friends.
Yeah. That's nice. Get out of the kitchen. Soon after Bridezilla and Groomonster arrived in OUR kitchen, all of the Bridesmaid'hobitches came in after them and scolded us because it was "cold in here, can't you shut that door? We're cold. Shut the door!" No fucking way.
-------- Posted by Foodwhore at May 16, 2004 12:01 AM 
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