Diary of The Food Whore: Helpful Hint #457

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Helpful Hint #457

April 02, 2005

Ok so when you're at a function where the food is served buffet style, please take note (and take to heart) the following tip.

WAIT UNTIL YOU ARE GIVEN THE GO AHEAD BEFORE GETTING IN LINE AND SHOVELING FOOD ON TO YOUR PLATE LIKE SCHOOL KIDS IN THE CAFETERIA ON PIZZA DAY.

Because chances are, even though you may think you are so hungry and so desperate for a shrimp roll that you shove your way in front of the caterer and start loading up your plate on the food that is out there, the reality is that all of the food might not actually be on the table. And when the caterer is trying - in vain - to bring the rest of the food out and set up a pretty display, you will ruin it. And your rudness and utter disregard for any kind of class and decorum will cause The Caterer great distress and you will become fodder in the kitchen. (And, you know, on someone's website)

If you're so hungry, get a snack on the way to the venue. Pop a few Triscuits in your pocket or grab some McNuggets. Eat a sugar cube for all I care.

But for the love of God have enough sense to wait for an annoucement from the Host or Hostess or at least wait until you see The Caterer give said Host or Hostess a nod signaling the all clear.

Thank you.

And good night.

Posted by Foodwhore at April 2, 2005 10:26 PM

Great & wise words. I wondered what I was doing wrong. Cheers.

Posted by: aussieshiraz at April 3, 2005 09:48 PM

I have been truely enjoying your blog...as one who loves food, and one who also did many banquets in the hotel industry...both in the kitchen (goodness it was tough being a woman back there 15 years ago) as well as the front of the house...

and while I would love to work with food for a living, I am not sure I have the stamina anymore for it

and as a future bride...I solomnly swear to do my best not to be bridezilla...but then I want the officiant to say 'your married' as fast as possible so we can then eat! (of course once everything is ready...but the food is the most important part of this party we are planning)

Posted by: mschaos at April 4, 2005 06:27 AM

food whore.

growing up in a very "social" setting, my mother always taught me to assume the last in line in a party/buffet situation, no matter how hungry you were... this discipline always garnered reems of adult admiration - and often, i would find myself with special treats from the host/hostess for my patience!

i was always garishly disappointed by those who would jockey there way, often shamelessly, to the front of the line!

glad to have found your blog - come visit.

u.e.

Posted by: ulteriorepicure at April 5, 2005 07:50 AM

I confess to jockying once. I was 16 weeks pregnant, it had been a long church service and I was seriously starved to death.

"AHEM" the poor beleagured caterer said as I dropped a ham biscuit into my hungry maw.

"I KNOW" I said. "I have a friend ... she's taught me what it is to be you ... I know this is rude ... but I'm PREGNANT and I am SO FREAKING HUNGRY!"

"Right. Then better hit the chocolate dipped strawberries too. And the cucumber sandwiches. And if you wait a minute, I'll slip ya some shrimp."

"You are a kind and decent American," I said.

I ate the food surreptitiously in an upstairs bedroom and tried not to smear chocolate all over myself.

Posted by: Damomma at April 6, 2005 12:49 PM