Diary of The Food Whore: Timing

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Timing

July 26, 2005

95% of the time, the calls I take from Clients are pleasant and witout issue.

But it's the other 5% that's going to kill me.

Like today, for instance. I still don't get people who wait until the 11th hour to make arrangements for things.

Here we are the 26th of July and I just took a call for the 27th of August. THE 27TH OF AUGUST!

And it's a wedding - not some imromptu business function or family gathering. This is a wedding that's been in the planning since February. FEBRUARY. But they just thought, "It would be no problem since it's an entire month away..."

Now, when you're waiting for a vacation or for your birthday or something like the Semi-Annual sale at Nordsrtom, you can say things like, "It's an ENTIRE month until I finally get to go on vacation!" or "I have an ENTIRE month to wait until I can get those Cole Haan boots I've had my eyes on."

But when it's something like sceduling a caterer - the person who's going to actually make your reception fabulous, you are only entitled to say, "It's ONLY a month away. I need to get my shit together!"

Who does this? What kind of moron sits back and says, "Well, all we have left is to make sure we have food to eat..." COME ON!

So of course I had to say, "No, I am sorry. We are booked", and give the lady advice on where to turn, next. All the while she's just freaking out at the prospect that it might, in fact, be too damn late.

What I wanted to say was, "Just get back on The Stupid Train, Lady. Because the next stop is Get A Clue Town!"

And no - maturity is not my middle name.

Posted by Foodwhore at July 26, 2005 02:50 PM

Aren't those the people that usually end up drafting family help to slice cold cuts and dip petit fours the night before the wedding?

(yes, I've been the family help... inlaws, what can you do about them?)

Posted by: Alida at July 26, 2005 03:33 PM

My wedding is on Saturday - is it too late to book you? :)

Posted by: Swankette at July 26, 2005 04:03 PM

This is America, remember. Trump came back in no time, Rachel Ray can do it in 30 minutes and for 40 dollars. Why the hell can't you get your shit together in 1 month to feed 200 people flawlessly with fish swimming in King Midas' spit?
Be shallow and triple the pricel, nah 4x that summbitch.

Biggles

Posted by: Dr. Biggles at July 26, 2005 04:39 PM

Do what I did, you idiot (the woman who called you): have pizza and a polka band and a cake. Not hard, not scary, and a whole lot of fun.

Sheesh. People.

Posted by: Jo at July 26, 2005 04:58 PM

Were they hoping this wedding wasn't going to happen? LOL.

Posted by: Schnee at July 26, 2005 07:44 PM

"Just get back on The Stupid Train, Lady. Because the next stop is Get A Clue Town!"

That is my new favorite line!

Posted by: Gail at July 27, 2005 06:46 AM

Sounds like it might have to be a "cake, punch, nuts and mints" reception to me. Do they still have time to order the paper napkins with their names on them? Probably not :-)

Posted by: Cheri at July 27, 2005 08:46 PM

Well, I'm sure they spent the last 5 months deciding reception details that were far more important than the meal they'd be serving...like coming up with the color scheme for the balloon arch.

Posted by: Lina at July 27, 2005 10:38 PM