I so wish I could crash this shindig. I'm having premarinated and stored in plastic pork tenderloin with probably either boxed mac n cheese or cheesy rice. Or maybe one of those bags of frozen pasta and brocolli.
Food Whore Overboard Dinner Party sounds like so much more fun! Tell Velma that nice people just say "thank you."

I'm just.....speechless. Waking someone up at 7AM on a Saturday to tell them what to do, and it's not your mother? Un-Effing-Believable.

Cook on!

On the stove tonight: chili from pork shoulder, with beans, thanks, and polenta.

GOSH, she wanted you to put the chips in a bowl? I bet she wanted the salsa in a bowl too...instead of down her shirt!

(Only my kids get to wake me up at 7am.)

Let me guess....Velma is one of those passive aggressive twats roaming around out there. Let's say for shits and giggles, that you actually said to her: "You know, you're right, I'll make it simple and everyone will be happy with the company and cocktails"...right?
Fast forward to the party, people raising eyebrows (or not) that the food whore dared to serve such crap...right?
THEN...Veltwatma goes around feeding the monster (or trying to create it)of, or closely related to: "And she calls herself a caterer, *this* is proper party offerings?" with the requisite tongue clucking.
I freaking, fucking HATE people like her.
And why is she coming to your house?

That must be your mother-in-law. Mine says the same thing every time! But it's way to late to turn back - it's your thing, your signature. Everyone would be shocked and disappointed if you set out torilla chips and Velveeta dip. I don't think you could do that - neither could I!

If she doesn't like the food, she doesn't have to eat it. I bet she didn't bring a hostess gift either.

Hope it all went well - and remember my #1 reason for throwing a dinner party: LEFTOVERS!

So tell us what was on the menu!!

I've told you once, I'll tell you again.

it only takes a smidge of rat poison in a stuffed mushroom to send someone home early from a cocktail party.

I'm wondering why Velma even gets an invite? If she hates you and you hate her, she's allowed in your house because......?????? If she's not related, CUT HER LOOSE! Life is too short to have 'friends' who aren't.

First off, everyone likes to eat food that they didn't have to cook themselves and sit around in a living room that they didn't have to clean themselves. Second, it may be Halloween, but there's no reason to be inviting witches (or other things that rhyme with "witch", if you follow me) into you home. Try putting a little garlic on the door and see if that wards her off.
ROTFL! Veg, you are my hero. I'm thinking of printing that little saying off and hanging over my door.
--RLR :-)

Im totally baffled by this situation. The early phone call was grounds for dismissal as a friend (is she a friend?)

So shes concerned about too much food? WTF does she care? She doesnt have to eat it. Does she bring stuff and get insulted when people dont eat it because youve been a good hostess and had enough?

We always tell people not to bring anything because we will have enough food. They always do and we always end up with party food (read: not healthy for everyday diabetic and chubby older girl) for weeks. And we dont even MAKE anything half as good as your professional self probably does.
*meh* still baffled.
Dot

I hope you set out a little bowl of chips for Velma. "Oh, no, Velma. Here. These are your appetizers, these chips in the bowl."