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Tooth Picker
November 15, 2005

One of the things I love most about Corn on the Cob - besides the fact that it's oh so fabulous - is the idea that it's one of those forgiveable messy foods like ribs dripping with sweet and spicy bar-b-que sauce, or chunks of succulent Maine lobster dunked in drawn butter.
And short of cutting the kernels off the cob and eating them with a fork (which The Friend in Virginia does and it makes me crazy), there's just no way to eat the stuff without having a glorious stream of golden butter dripping down your chin.
That's the only way to eat it, actually.

And then, you know, there's all that corn left in your teeth. That's just another bonus of the entire corn experience, in my humble opinion.

Andt that's what toothpicks are for, right? So when you're sitting under a maple tree in your sister's back yard having a contest to see who can eat more corn (I lost my title this year), you can recline and pick your teeth. It's a forgiveable action on a warm summer night while you dangle your feet in the pool.

When it's not forgiveable, however, is when you're in a nice restaurant with friends enjoying a nice creme brule' and conversation.
I don't care that you've got a piece of popcorn seed stuck in your right molar from last night's movie snack, and I don't want to have to see you digging in said molar like Indiana Jones.
And I certainly don't want to see you slip and poke that dangly thing in the back of your throat, which then makes you gag. And I do not, under any circumstances, what to see the look of glee on your face as you finally extract that popcorn seed from your molar, nor do I ever - EVER - want to see the seed.
And the thing is, you did this last time we dined out. And I tried to overlook it.
But now I will have no choice but to hate you.

Posted by Foodwhore at November 15, 2005 11:28 AM

Vent, food whore, vent!!!

Posted by: meginAB at November 15, 2005 01:20 PM

This isn't your sweet hubby, is it?

Posted by: veg4me at November 15, 2005 01:20 PM

Mmm, corn. Might have some tonight.

Posted by: kitchen hand at November 15, 2005 04:45 PM

True, it is rather rude to do major teeth mining in public but at least no nails were clipped in public. I HAVE seen that done. Nearly brought my food back up too... Err.. still feeling gooshy about that.

Posted by: Nerissa at November 15, 2005 09:07 PM

*shudder* And it's something that they think there is nothing wrong with doing it. So gross.

Posted by: Melissa at November 16, 2005 08:57 AM

omg Kris, so long since i'vestopped by to read. still sooooo awesome;)

Posted by: roy at November 16, 2005 11:19 AM

ICK.

the worst still must be when they scrape it off the nail and chew on it. what is it, cud?

DOUBLE ICK.


sorry.

(finally finished the archives and feeling a little down about it. what will i do!)

Posted by: joy at November 17, 2005 04:18 PM

Sadly, since knocking out my front tooth, I no longer know the joys of eating straight off the cob. If I want to keep my cap in place, I have to cut the corn of the cob and it does lose something as a result.

Posted by: Emma at November 21, 2005 09:20 AM
 
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