Oh. My.

My daughter threw up at a restaurant last year. Right next to the table. Fortunately there was only one other party in that section of the restaurant, and they were just lingering over coffee, and were grandparents, and rather than being angry/annoyed were just concerned about her. The wait staff was wonderful, asking about her, getting the mop out, fussing over her, offering her some ginger ale right after, and not making us feel more embarrassed about it then we already were. We got our food to go and left a 20%+ tip on what turned out to be a take out order. The staff more than deserved it (if I'd had the money I would have given a 100%), what with cleaning up after us, and especially with how kind they were about it. I can't imagine just leaving without even a thank you after that. We've been back there several times since, and make sure to leave a good tip every time.

I'd refuse those people reservations in the future; if there's a way to legally refuse them service if they just walk in, I'd put them on a black list, and if you absolutely have to let them in, let them know up front that there will be a 20% gratuity added on to the bill. (Of course you're talking to a woman who hung up on a client who was yelling at her when she worked for H&R Block.) You and your staff shouldn't have to put up with this, and the rest of us don't want you to burn out. We like going to your restaurant (or at least we would if we didn't live thousands of miles away)!

I've had a similar incident while I was working in retail. A family came in, one of the daughters (age 13+ mind you. Not a kid!) was looking a tad green and complaining that she didn't feel good.

Mom ignored her and continued to shop for over an hour.

Daughter then bazooka barfed, Exorcist-style towards the front of the store.
Mom basically grabbed her and ran. No apologies, no nothing.
She then had the nerve to call the store and bitch out the manager, because apparently the staff was rude and unsymapthetic.

No, we were horrified. Then just stunned.

They're not allowed to shop there anymore.

Sometimes people just suck. All you can do is grab another Lemon Drop and knock it back!

Wow, what assholes. Do you have a policy of adding the tip on groups over a certain amount? Most restaurants I've been in have that little policy. I suppose from working real hard, then getting screwed over at the end of the day.

After the anger subsides, I would say this one deserves a phone call. Totally professional and calm, but from the perspective of, "I wasn't there that night. I understand you didn't leave any tip. What was it about our service that made you so unhappy?"

And *then* blacklist them.

How dare they? If I were you, I would not allow them back into your restaurant. As a server, I would be mortified t be treated that way and then not tipped. I don't think the general public realizes that servers, bartenders, hostesses and bussers make $2.13 PLUS their tips! We don't get a paycheck! At least you have a privatly owned establishment that can refuse service to someone if need be. btw, I think the flowers were sweet and the fact that they didn't tip makes them the lowest lifeform on earth!

I would definately institute a policy of gratuity added to parties over a certain size! And send a bill to those people for the flowers! If more people were told that they were not welcome back to a place because of their behavoir maybe just maybe they would start behaving like human beings and stop treating waitpersons like servants!

My Brother in law does this! He actually snaps his damn fingers at a server/busperson! Last time I saw him do that I told him that the people who work here are serving you dinner not kissing your ass and acting like an asshat will only get crappier service or more likely it will be the shortest dinner you have ever had because they will put a rush on you just to get you the hell out of their place. My sister in law told me later that they indeed do have very very quick dinners out and it's usually impossiable to get a reservation for someplaces. Told her It's because those restraunts have put there phone number(s) on a do not reserve list because her husband is an asshole. I'm not sure if it's true or not I just said that to scare her into maybe making her husband act human.

I would definitely phone and issue a cold reminder that "tip was not included in the quoted price of the meal."(cut them slack, could have been a misunderstanding, most restaurants include tip in parties over 8 - of course, I live in NYC, so we're anal about tipping) They need to be called out on it, however. Hopefully, the vomitress isn't insinuating that her episode was due to your food. I would nip that in the bud by stating your employees noticed she was greenish/drunk off of her ass when she came into the restaurant and noted that she had an "accident" in the bathroom. People are such pigs! That deserved a 30 percent tip and an apology by itself!

I'm surprised there wasn't an automatic tip for large parties.

Around here, an included gratuity of 15-20% for parties of 8 or more is standard.

I definitely agree with the comments so far: a call is in order.

Okay ive done food service as a waitress for years. And it always steams my ass to be stiffed on a disrespectful table. unfortunatly ive never worked somewhere that gratuity is added to the bill... One time i worked a party of 50 high school kids with the staff of the school and left me and my co worker 9 whole dollars. My boss decided that buying us 10$ gas cards was in some way sufficient. so i went into the book, found the reservation, number and called them. They got pissy with me but i dont care, it was my last week there.

jerks

i hate people sometimes... definitly adopt a policy on auto gratuity

omygod you have to record that conversation and play it for us! I would love to hear their justification for that kind of behaviour.

Maybe they were all drunk and no one thought of it.

The nerve. RRRrrrrrr. Yes, that's me growling. I worked as a pastry chef and I know restaurant folk EARN their money. Holy crud, what kind of justification can these dolts have for that kind of behavior?

The bottom of the menu should read...a 17% gratuity will be added to the tab of parties of 5 or more. Period.

And if they aren't in that category, find out their names and keep them from coming back.

If I were juvenile, I'd get the address off the check (hopefully good)and leave a flaming bag of poo on their doorstep & ring bell. I wouldn't, but they are certainly worthy of it.

Wow. Just Wow.

Understandable that you are "fit to be tied." Definitely make the phone call. And please share with us the conversation. I am trying to remain hopeful that it was some OVERSIGHT... cause I can't believe people would be so thoughtless, rude, stupid.

I admire you for wanting to wait until the anger subsides. Personally, I think you should call them now, while your juices are flowing. Who cares if they never come back,,,,,if they tell the story to others do you think people are really going to sympathize with them?

Where do people get off feeling entitled? We live in a society of entitled brats.

I'd be pissed nine ways from Sunday.

email me their phone #. I'd LOVE to call them on your behalf.

Your tales bring back buried memories of my restaurant days. I remember one night I had a couple that ran me ragged for over two hours. They ordered everthing, including a series of wines, etc. When they left, they left no tip. Another table superglued a penny to the table. I think someone has started a blog that posts the names of these rude people.

I used to work at a Chinese restaurant. If my little boss lady noticed that they didn't leave me a tip, she would literally chase the person into the parking lot screaming "Why you not tip my waitress?" "You not like the food?" "She rude?" It was incredibly embarassing for me AND the customer. I finally just started hiding the fact.

It was funny, though to see their faces when she came running out after them. It definitely was called for in this situation.

Be angry.

Don't ever reach the point of "being jaded enough..." because that is the point where you lose your humanity and your personality hardens as if Medusa rented a room in your house.

I've seen loads of inexcusable human behavior in my days. I'm constantly shocked when someone reaches new levels of depravity or demonstrates that decent morality is dead. If we ever reach the point where we are no longer floored by these creatures from a Stephen King novel who parade around as humans, then we in turn become them. Yuck. Stay bewildered.

I LOVE your humor and read your site constantly. Thanks for all of the laughs. And yes, thanks for sharing these occasional horror stories too.

NOT defending them in any way, shape or form, but...

1. They might have assumed the tip was included, as it quite often is for parties of 6 or more...although a semi-intelligent person would have looked on the bill to see if that was indeed the case.

2. One asshole might have said "I'll cover the tip!" then not done it, or each might have thought someone else did it.

3. I once went after a customer who, after a $120+ meal, with extremely attentive waitstaff, walked out leaving a $5 bill. I chased him into the parking lot and said "here is your change, sir." He frowned and said "I left that on purpose! That's for the waitress!" I said "Oh. I'm so sorry, sir. Can you tell me, please, what was wrong with the service or food?" He said "Nothing! It was wonderful! That's why I left her $25!" He was mortified to discover he'd miscounted...he'd meant to leave $25 extra, not just $5! He came back in, apologized to her, and handed her $40.

So...sometimes...just sometimes...poor tipping is inadvertent. I wonder, if you call the folks who made the reservation, if they will lose friends over this, especially if they didn't know Guest A vomited, and Guest B didn't leave the tip he promised to leave? I should hope so!