How does one respond to this... MADNESS?

Is there something in the water where you are?

Have you been transported to Crazy Town via "The Twilight Zone" and somehow have internet access to write about this insanity?

Is someone slipping something into your Lemon Drops and you are just having hallucinations?

HOW IS IT POSSIBLE THAT YOU MUST SUFFER ALL THESE CRAZY PEOPLE???

My God, move NOW to CT... we have nuts here, but I swear it is not as bad as where you are!

Wow. How on earth do these people function in normal, everyday society? Look on the bright side: yes, you have to deal with them, but at least you get some priceless stories out of it.

I think LisaInCT is right. It must be something in the water, but it's not just your city. It's everywhere.

Wow. I've seen people here in NYC pushing dogs in their little granny carts, and even strollers, but no Posh Prams. Wow.

as always FW, you're hilarious. table for 18? sure... coz you know we always have a table for 18 people ready at our disposal... I'm a longtime restaurant employee. I totally get yah!

Welcome to the neighborhood.

The draft thing is something I've seen a certain mother-in-law-who-shall-remain-nameless do once. Sure, lady we'll swap tables with you in the middle of our meal. Ahhhhhhhhh

Classic post. Thanks for the laugh.

you are a freak magnet. my husband is one too, so you are in good company. what the heck is the matter with people? daaaang...

Oh man Thanks! I needed this today. heh. Crazy.

I worked for a city until 2004 when I was Rif'd (I did get a good retirement out of it). We had a council member like those two. He never really understood how many stories people shared about him (like the time he showed up at a 6 p.m. bookstore signing for Emeril and was totally wasted).

Our art class had an end-of-term lunch locally, but a class member coordinated it (there were 20 of us and 3 nice large round tables) a week or 2 before so it was not a problem for the restaurant. It was a chinese restaurant and we shared dishes, so that helped the restaurant staff.

I don't know why people think their dogs (non-service type) are welcome inside restaurants (we have some in my area where dogs are allowed on the patio).

Makes you wonder about humanity and where we are headed. I often read Dear Abby and can't believe some of the things people write in about. Can it be that those of us who are "normal", whatever that is, are in the minority? Kind of scary.

Job. Has anyone called you Job lately?

@lisainCT:

I just closed a yarn shop in CT (Stamford). Trust me on this, the denizens of your fair state are just as whacked as the ones in Seattle. Particularly if they come from Greenwich, Darien, Cos Cob or New Canaan.

I moved to LA (the city, not the state) because even the Hollywierd people are saner than CTers. ANd the weather is better.

Two out of the three were, like, just about weekly occurances when I was working in restaurants. (The dog thing I never had happen.)

I once had a man call me over to his table to show me an elm bug he was holding (probably rode in on his coat after dropping from one of the elm trees that lined the street outside the restaurant). He tried to convince me that he found it in his food.

Uh, no, sir. I don't think that lively little elm bug that's crawling around on your hand is a survivor of the pasta-cooking process. When I told him my elm-tree/coat theory, he agreed, but still tried to get me to comp his bill and give him a gift certificate for another meal because he had found a bug in the restaurant.

I declined to do this but instead presented him with a coupon from a competitor ($5 off two entrees) that someone else had mistakenly and futilely tried to redeem in my restaurant.

Ah, the citizens of Crazy Town!

Wonderufl and funny post and yes, you do seem to be a long standing resident of, Crazy Town.

No, no. They're just other city council members.

They'd be Mayor and First Lady if they'd insisted it was their baby and made a fuss.

See, that's top-grade crazy.

Every state/county has a Crazy Town and the elected officials are usually representative of that fact. And if they aren't crazies, they're usually crooks.

When I read the part about the dog in the pram.....it took me a couple minutes to connect my jaw back up to my mouth. Good Grief. They probably keep their kid tied to a tree in the back yard.