Diary of The Food Whore: Man Down

Man Down

November 28, 2007

I've been stressed. The Underwear thing didn't help. But one of our best at The Restaurant will be leaving in January. Anyone in this industry knows how hard it is to get good people. And while I am thrilled for their next venture, selfishly I am depressed at the idea of replacing them.

So I decided to take my mind off things by decorating for Christmas. I turned on The Jackson 5 Christmas, made myself a cocktail, and set to decorating.

And things were going fairly well until I dropped the Baby Jesus.

Which, technically isn't as bad as the year The Friend called in a panic because not only did she drop The Baby Jesus - his head came off.

The Jewish Friends like to give me a bad time about all the stress over the Nativity and Baby Jesus. "Get yourself a nice Menorah and celebrate the season of light". Right. Me. Big candelabra. Open Flames. Open flames around liquor.

But - dropping The Baby Jesus can't be a good sign. Especially when, you know, I accidentally stepped on Him.

I made an extra batch of Hot Buttered Rum Batter.

I bet it's gone by Friday.

Posted by Foodwhore at November 28, 2007 10:15 AM

I'm sure that the Get Out of Purgatory Free points you earned while retrieving men's underwear (why? how? do we even want to know?) from the restaurant toilet have more than made up for the fact that you stepped on a representation of Our Lord. Although, Phil, Prince of Insufficient Light, might still darn you to heck for the offense ..... :-)

Posted by: RLR at November 28, 2007 11:55 AM

I did HB Rum at thxgiving. Mmmm. My favorite part is eating it, and throwing back the shot of rum. *smack smack*. And don't worry. Jesus forgives you. Isn't that the whole point? I'm sure your not the first or last to inadvertanly....shoe Him a little bit. At least you didn't nail him to anything. Ooo, bad taste. signing off now.

Posted by: Shelley at November 28, 2007 03:55 PM

If Jesus could do the Ascencion, I'm sure He understands about the coming down part and doesn't the pope kiss people on the feet? I suppose he could be a bit tetchy if you were standing on him though...

Posted by: neil at November 28, 2007 04:57 PM

Give it three days and he'll be as good as new.

Posted by: BC at November 29, 2007 12:24 AM

This reminds me of a story my law teacher told us. He went to school at Holy Cross, where, for each Christmas, they set up a nativity scene. Well, Coach and his friends decided that it was wrong for the baby Jesus to be in the scene before Christmas Day, his birthday. So...they stole him and left a note, telling the school they would return it on the right day. Which they did. It made us laugh, though he denies his invlovement.

Posted by: Amy Marie at November 29, 2007 05:43 PM

ROFLMAO @ Shelley, Neil and BC!

I will most definitely make HBR for my next family gathering but will have to substitute something for the R- husband can't drink it after binging-and-puking on it in his younger days.

Posted by: AuntJone at November 30, 2007 07:55 AM

It's only a figurine.

Posted by: Maggie at December 1, 2007 07:18 AM