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Life Lessons For The Week
January 16, 2008

I've learned not to walk close to the curb in NYC on a rainy day. Cars go fast. Trucks go fast. Big mud puddles splash like the log ride at Busch Gardens. But I've also learned that when you're standing there dripping wet and people stop to stare and laugh - it's ok. Maybe they needed the laugh. Even if it is your family - the bastards.

I've learned that no matter how much brushing and flossing I do the Evil Doers at the dentist office will still shred your gums with sharp tools and tell you that you don't seem to be brushing and flossing enough. And seriously - where is Dental Hygenist School - Torture Town? Of course my gums are bleeding - how about I ram yours with repeatedly a fish hook? I bet yours will bleed to.

I've learned that one day in Boston is not enough. (Oh - did I tell you I went to Boston for a day? We power tripped it during our stay in NYC and had a fabulous day.) What a gorgeous city that is - and what gorgeous friends I have there.

I've learned that no matter how many times I told my friend not to wear his Boston Red Sox jacket in NY, it will take an angry mob on 7th Avenue for him to listen.

I've learned that some people just don't understand, no matter how many times I tell them, that when fish smells like fish - it's bad. So Very Bad.

I've learned that no matter how many times I try to take a picture -it will just be nostrils or feet.

I've learned that no matter how much I think I can sing, others will not agree.

I've learned that no matter how many times I tell my friends that Reservations Are Your Friend, they will still roll their eyes when they tell me they had to wait a long time for a table at the restauraunt they took their family to - ALL 10 OF THEM.

I've learned that no matter how much I want to be a Rockette - I need to make peace with the fact that the ship has sailed - and, you know, my butt is too big. And I am old. And clumsy. And can't dance.

Whatever.


I've learned that no matter how many times I try to tell Brides that I can't do a well done prime rib - they won't get it until you serve them a piece and they equate it to charcoal briquettes. Yeah. I KNOW.

That's all for now.

Posted by Foodwhore at January 16, 2008 09:20 PM

No alto-sham at your disposal?

Posted by: Raging Lunatic at January 17, 2008 12:56 AM

Well-done prime rib. That's a crime against nature and a waste of a good cow. Oy.

Posted by: JulieT at January 17, 2008 05:39 AM

What did you do in Boston?

Posted by: StevenHB at January 17, 2008 06:12 AM

My life lesson: When the angry ten top (without reservation) sits down an hour after they demand a table, The bread in the bread oven will be cold and someone will want bread RIGHT NOW!

Posted by: Leslie at January 17, 2008 07:18 AM

Better a Red Sox jacket in New York than a Yankees jacket in Boston! I wear my Red Sox hat all the time in NYC, and get more compliments than insults. In Boston, you have to fear for your life if you dare wear ANY Yankees garment!

BTW... your hotel in NYC is half a block from my apartment! Crazy neighborhood, no? =)

And what did you do in Boston? I miss it.

Posted by: Kelli at January 17, 2008 03:55 PM

Awww, you were in Boston? Curious to hear what you did while you were here.

Posted by: Aimee at January 17, 2008 06:05 PM
 
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